Coping with dementia and shadowing

Question: Mum follows dad around the house constantly. He tries to put her in front of the TV just for a break but she doesn’t sit still for very long and gets agitated after a short while. Dad is getting frustrated and doesn’t know how to keep her occupied, what can he do?

Answer: This is called “shadowing” and can be accompanied by constant repetitive questioning. It is quite common and can be maddening, but it is important to remember that the person living with dementia is not doing it on purpose.

Shadowing is often a symptom of anxiety or insecurity – the person is quiet frightened and needs the security of someone known being around and visible.

It may be possible to occupy the person with ‘busy work’ shelling peas, folding tea towels, dusting or polishing silver or shoes while they are in the same room gives you respite from ‘hovering’.

Sometimes the person cannot concentrate or follow the TV and gets frustrated – you can try a DVD of a really well known and loved TV programme from the past that is short, clear and meaningful.

Family photos (especially from the past) that the person recognises can also be scanned and automatically played on TV through a DVD player.

Sometimes, no matter what we do we can’t change the behaviour, so the key is to get some respite for yourself. Try arranging community service, people at your local club or church to take the person out. Ask a relative or friend to stay with them to allow you some time out.

Article by: 
AgedCarer contributor
Meredith Gresham (Consultant Occupational Therapist)